


No Good For Anyone

by Nihonkikuasa211



Category: Code Black (TV)
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Crying, Dating, Friendship, Hugging, Other, post 1X12
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-14
Updated: 2016-01-14
Packaged: 2018-05-13 23:58:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5721955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nihonkikuasa211/pseuds/Nihonkikuasa211
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Angus asks Heather out an a date, it is later revealed that she kissed Mario. The situation causes Angus to leak out the anger that he has felt from Mario, and states harsh words that he should not have. Will Angus have Mario's forgiveness?</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Good For Anyone

_No Good For Anyone_

Angus knew that something was wrong when he asked Heather out on a date. She seemed surprised, and Angus that he saw apprehension in her expression before it disappeared. Even when on the date, Heather seemed distracted and didn’t make any attempt of conversation. Her eyes seemed distant, and a smile didn’t reach her eyes when Angus asked how the food was. When he leaned in to kiss her outside of the restaurant, Angus could see Heather freeze, and she sighed for a moment before she stated that she had already kissed someone.

                “Okay,” Angus stated, not knowing where this was going. He tried to look at Heather, but found an expression that he knew too well. Guilt. The young surgeon who he had comforted as she cried appeared tired as she stated the name that Angus _knew_ would come from her lips.

                “I should have known,” Angus stated under his breath. He tried to keep calm, but found that anger was pulsing through his veins. He tried to smile at Heather, but it was more of a twitching of his lips. “Should I walk you home?” he asked.

                “No, I’ll be fine.” Heather’s eyes were wide, and she swallowed as Angus nodded slowly. “Angus,” she shouted as the first year resident started to walk away, “I’m sorry!”

                _Don’t be,_ Angus wanted to say as he looked at the crestfallen young woman with brown hair. _It’s my fault for even thinking I had a chance._ But he didn’t say anything. Instead, Angus stuffed his hands in his pockets and started walking to Angels Memorial.

                White-hot anger was streaming through Angus’ veins by the time he found the familiar locker room. He found Mario. His back was turned to him, and the light brown-haired resident attempted to breathe as Mario continued to ignore him.

                “When were you going to tell me that you had kissed Heather?” Angus attempted to keep his voice calm, and it almost worked until Mario finally turned to him. The resident was still wearing his scrubs, his name tag still attached as an expression of confusion and then shock…and then something else framed him face. “When were you going to tell me, Mario?”

                “We did more than kiss, Angus.” Then Mario stopped, realizing what he had said and held up his hands. Angus could physically feel the anger on his lips. Never, in his life before, had he wanted to punch someone some badly in his life. _Mario knew, and yet he allowed gullible me to ask for a_ damn _day off that I could have used to pay off some of my med school debt, but_ no _. Mario damn Savetti had to make me a fool._ Again _._ “Look,” Mario started to say with apprehension as Agnus continued to stare at him without speaking. “It was between two consenting adults, and –”

                “Shut. Up.” Mario shut up. Angus continued to breathe through his nose, attempting to reign in the white-hot anger pooling in his stomach. “Why do you have to take _everything_ from me?” This time Angus smiled, and he almost relished of how Mario almost backed away. “Hmm? Everything, Mario? When I came here, I thought I would be able to maybe feel good about myself for once.” Angus was breathing heavy now, his hands curled by his sides as he looked at Mario. The darker-haired resident was looking shocked, as if he had never imagined Angus would ever talk back to him. “But then, there was a bastard that made me make a decision that almost made me get kicked out of the program. And then,” Angus raised his hand as Mario attempted to speak, “you _used_ my name when you were careless enough to get yourself pricked with a patient who was HIV positive.” That had an effect on Mario, the other resident could see. He flinched, and his eyes lowered to the ground. _Stop,_ a voice inside Angus stated. _Stop. Before you say anything that can’t be taken back._ Angus didn’t care though. He had been through enough.

                “He died, though, didn’t he? He died,” Angus stated, feeling something so close to satisfaction as he watched Mario’s face darken in anger. “And you didn’t do anything to help him.”

                “I _tried_ ,” Mario stated through clenched teeth, “my best.”

                “Your _best_ didn’t help when you took my credit for your patient, Dr. Savetti.” Angus stated mockingly, loving of how scandalized Mario looked as he stated the title that he worked so hard for and no one believed him for it. “And earlier, you were about to let a patient die as he was being crushed by cement. _Die_ , like he was some slab of damn meat –!”

                “What do you want me to say?” Mario roared. His dark eyes were engulfed in rage as he stared at Angus. “That I’m sorry? That I’m an asshole? That I shouldn’t even _be_ here?”

                “I think you like taking away everything that makes me feel happy, Mario.” _Stop,_ a voice shouted in Angus’ head. _Stop talking._ “I think…that you relish in the pain of others, because that makes you feel good, right? And that…is just wrong.” Mario wasn’t trying to speak anymore. Instead, he was staring. He was staring at Angus as if he had never seen him before. “You won’t be good for Heather, Mario.”

                “And why is that?” Mario crossed his arms over his chest, and if Angus would have noticed, the resident was pressing his fingernails deeply into his arms.

                “You poison everything!” Angus shouted. “Everything you touch, you poison, Mario!” Angus didn’t note of how Mario was still, and of how Mario’s face was becoming pale with every word.

                “You’re no good for anyone!”

                 The anger receded as soon as Angus stated those words. _Oh, God._ Angus swallowed, his heart almost stopping as the words that came from _him_ echoed relentlessly in his ears. _Oh, God._

                “Mario.” His voice sounded faint. He was aware of the faint pleading in his voice. “Mario –”

                “Don’t.” Mario’s voice was pure ice. He turned, and Angus could see a shudder going through his – through the young resident. His eyes were cold. Angus didn’t move as Mario pushed passed him, the door slamming hard as Angus leaned against the locker as his dead heartbeat echoed in his ears.

* * *

 

        They didn’t speak for three days. And what a hellish three days it was. Angus could barely focus, feeling distant to the world as his mind flashed backed to the words exchanged between them. _I shouldn’t have said that._ The words seemed to be his mantra as Angus moved slowly in a world he was supposed to be living in. _I should have just kept my mouth shut._ He was grateful that Heather was in the OR. He wouldn’t have known what to say to her if he ever saw her again. Eventually Dr. Rorish got on his case, asking him why he administered this medication to a patient when the patient was supposed to receive a different medication. Angus didn’t know what to say. The noise of the numerous waiting patients among squalling children seemed to suit his mind more than saving a critical patient’s life. It was strange to him, Angus thought, that Mario’s absence could have caused such a difference in him. He hadn’t realized of how much he spent around the other resident, until now. Angus found that he missed Mario’s presence beside him as they worked, and of how – despite the sudden rift in their relationship – he _missed_ the person that he had once wished would lose his license. By the end of the third day, Angus had enough. Mario’s absence and silence was drowning him – every moment that Angus was beside Mario but they didn’t speak was enough horror to him that he would not be ashamed he was started to cry and sobbed that he was sorry. The tension between the two, thick enough to cut with a knife, was enough that when Angus was back in the regular ER that the two that once worked together, worked with the other residents. Christa had asked what was going on, but the look in Angus’ eyes was enough to make her fall silent.

            Angus entered the locker room with a heavy heart, expecting that perhaps Mario had left early to not risk contact with him. He found the dark-haired resident exactly as he had been three days ago, with his back turned towards him.

           “Hey.” Angus winced, noting of how weak and breathless his voice sounded. He half expected Mario to ignore him, but he was surprised when Mario turned.

           “Hey.” The first year resident looked tired. There were bags under his eyes, and Angus could see that Mario was not directly looking at him.

           “It’s not the first time that anyone has said that to me before, you know.” This time Mario looked at him, and Angus stilled at the _pain_ in Mario’s dark brown eyes. It was enough to drown himself into oblivion.

                “Who was the first?” Angus rasped, afraid to hear the answer.

                “My dad,” was the answer. Mario licked his lips and half-smiled, almost chuckling when he saw Angus’ agonized expression. “I treat people like toys and just throw them away, don’t I, Angus?”

                Angus didn’t say a word as he saw Mario begin to laugh. A slightly hysterical laugh.

                “You’re…the one that said I had a black heart, after all.”

                “Don’t,” Angus stated as Mario suddenly started to pace. “Don’t. Mario –” The name caught in his throat when he saw unfamiliar liquid leaking from Mario’s eyes. The tears fell slowly, the other resident trying not to make them fall. But as soon as Mario’s dark brown eyes met Angus’ blue orbs, the tears fell from his eyes to his cheeks.

                “I’m nothing, aren’t I?” Mario’s voice halted, his voice almost inaudible as he stared at the ground where his tears started to gather on the floor. “I shouldn’t even _be_ here, I should be dead with a needle stuck in my arm.”

                “Mario.” Angus stated, but he found his voice took weak and unstable. He tried again. “Mario,” he stated again, his voice stronger. “Look at me.” The resident didn’t look at him, his face pointed to the ground. “Mario, look at me, please.” Mario’s dark brown eyes were the only thing Angus could see then, the tears trailing from his eyes pelting onto the ground as Angus held his breath.

                “You are…” Angus sighed, not certain what to truly say except what was echoing in his mind. “You are the most _human_ man I know, so…don’t you _dare_ tell yourself that you are nothing and that you should be _dead.”_

Mario swallowed, his dark brown eyes not looking toward Angus as the other resident continued speaking. “You don’t have a black heart, Mario.” The look that his friend gave him, with pure shock and confusion, was enough that Angus felt his eyes start to sting. “You have a _heart_ , with all of its flaws and irregularities, and it’s beautiful.” Without saying a word, the first year resident carefully put his arms around Mario and embraced him. He could feel Mario’s tender heartbeat against his own chest, and felt the darker resident relax slightly as his body became loose. “You are too…important to not be good to anyone, Mario,” Angus whispered. “I’m sorry that I said such cruel things.”

                The dark-haired resident didn’t respond. _Am I…doing something wrong?_ Angus wondered as the silence continued. _Maybe I shouldn’t have touched him._ His hands started to move away when Mario suddenly tightened his grip on Angus.

                “Don’t go,” he mumbled, sounding almost like a child. “It’s nice…what you’re doing, anyway.”

                “Did you know that hugs release chemicals such as oxytocin and –” Angus started to say.

                “Shut up,” Mario muttered. He seemed…content, a rasp slightly coating his voice.

                Together the two stayed close until Mario pulled away. The raw pain that had appeared in his eyes had disappeared, and for a moment he couldn’t stare at Angus.

                “Thank you,” he stated. Then he gave Angus a small smile that reached his eyes.


End file.
